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| Works by Claes Oldenburg and Coosje van Bruggen at 2019 FOG Art Fair in San Francisco |
How we view
the world depends on what we experience and what we surround ourselves with. We cannot control entirely of what we experience - my experiences of being a patient are good examples of this, but in some measure, we can control how we react in the aftermath of bad experiences. Currently, my life is all about rising above my physical discomfort/pain and emotional aftershock.
Honestly, I am not doing a
good job. I complain too much to Robert, my friends, and my mom, so I
feel very guilty about putting them through a difficult time with me.
However, in light of this, now I know (slightly) better about whom I can trust and build a life-long
friendship with.
When Robert and friends give me good advice and encouragement, my days are lighter and I can focus on my recovery without worrying too much. I always try to make my everyday schedule pretty tight, so I got very agitated on the days when I couldn't do anything due to having extreme pain and feeling numb due to pain medication. I
wanted to use this idle time at home to read many books, but I was not even capable of processing many words into my brain. It took me a while to accept that it is okay to take things slowly and I should not feel defeated because my body is working very hard to heal and I am spending a lot of energy on the recovery.
Tackling any
job with crutches takes so much time! Last Saturday, a friend described my life these days as "slow life," and suddenly I felt less dreary about my situation thinking about the term, slow living. I was always on my way to do the next task, but now I have become an observer - hope I can reflect and learn from my past and other people's present.
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