Are you bored at home?

Thanks for the friendship and making me smile :)

    So I've had quite a lot of people asking me whether I have been bored at home.  Luckily my answer is "no."  When I got home from the hospital, I barely survived every day due to having extreme pain and being drowsy all the time - so there was no time to be bored back then.  Lately, my pain became tolerable, and yes, I do feel trapped at home.   I miss the feeling of the fresh air on my face, and it will be cold winter when I can go outside by myself with lesser risk.  I am very disheartened to take a leave of absence (again! Deja vu!) from the new school and the program.  So, I definitely want to get out there!  However, speaking of my boredom, I have kept myself busy at home and haven't felt bored at all yet!  In fact, I think days are passing by so quickly.  Here are the things I do at home these days.

1. Reading

   I am currently reading ten books at the same time.  I can read books pretty fast in Korean - I usually finish Korean books in one sitting and do not read multiple books at the same time, although I go back to the same text again and again if I love it or need to understand more profound philosophy behind it.  So reading multiple books at the same time is relatively new to me, but I enjoy it so far!  Some books (e.g., "The Spirit Catches You and You Fall Down" by Anne Fadiman) are very intense and emotionally engaging, so I need to take a break before moving onto the next chapter.  Since I can't go out for a walk, reading a different book transports me to different ambiances and moods.  Recently, my dear friend sent me a lovely care package from Korea (the picture above!) with new books (and a beautiful doll that makes me smile all the time).  More reading materials for my soul and brain! 

2. Talking on a phone

   I recently moved to Durham, NC, for school and only have a few people who can check on me in person.  Robert works in LA (and NYC until early October) on weekdays, so I am mostly alone at home.  Albeit not in person, fortunately, I have my lovely people whom I trust entirely and can tell them any random thoughts I am having on a phone.  I distracted myself by talking on a phone when I had severe pain in the early days of the recovery.  I am so grateful for their kindness, wisdom, and understanding.  Recently, I am FaceTiming almost all day on Wednesday and Friday with a friend (whom I met as a coworker) to work on our research that got accepted at a conference.  I can't thank them enough for keeping me sane while I am all alone (and severely injured) in a new town.

3. Planning future trips

   I started to travel a lot as a grad student when I came back from medical leave.  I had been an international student in the US since 2002, and going back home in Korea during breaks was enough traveling for a while.  However, after having a life-altering hit-and-run car accident in 2011, I have realized that our time on earth can end anytime - I did not want to postpone any adventure or having a good time in a new place anymore.  So I felt very down when I had to cancel two trips in this October because of my injury.  Robert and I planned our Paris trip in December, but it is not happening because my risk of getting embolism is still high for air travel.  Even though I can't travel right now, reading travel guide books gives me so much motivation to get better and enjoy our lives.  (I still buy travel books - I prefer reading them because I find books more cohesive and efficient than searching for random information on the internet.)  Learning about a new culture and history as a temporary resident in a new city is thrilling. 

4. Rehabilitation exercise

   Rehab exercise is the most important thing I need to focus on at this moment.  However, I am not doing it enough because it is excruciating to do it, and I also suffer from inflammation and swelling that come after.  When I first got discharged from the hospital, I had my home-health physical therapy for two weeks.  I am still non weight-bearing, so exercises that I can do are minimal, and my physical therapist stopped coming because I learned everything he could teach.  (But the main reason he stopped visiting is an insurance issue.  He kept mentioning that the insurance company will start investigating and give him trouble when the home visit gets more extended than the "ideal" length.  Even if patients know every rehabilitation exercise, it is so beneficial to be forced to work with a physical therapist regularly.  They really don't know that...?  It is very upsetting to see so much is controlled by big corporations and money rather than something good for real humans in this country.)  I need to keep reminding myself every day to work on rehab exercises.  According to my PA, I am too young to have a stiff knee, so I need to work harder.

Bottom line: I can't even take out trash bags in front of our apartment unit door for the "valet trash" service.  Everything is difficult and takes so much energy and time from me - so I do not have energy and time left over to be bored.  The recovery is a mentally and physically draining process.  Thank you to my lovely people who have made me smile in the past two months.